yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
