margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
