perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
