So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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