Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
