went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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