Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
