ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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