OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
