two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
