i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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