dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Randomize
