Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
