We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize