ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
