Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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