How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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