Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
