OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
wrigley field is MILF paradise
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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