Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
