So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
