Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
