Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
