Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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