Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
