He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Randomize
