OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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