have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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