I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I think your dad took our porno
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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