I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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