Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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