the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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