I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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