I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
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