Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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