am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
