You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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