I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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