i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
The convent might be a nice break from real life
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
