just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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