He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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