I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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