what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
