How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
where does the pee come out of this thing
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
