I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
