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I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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