Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I feel like abortions should bother me more
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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