my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
How does one acquire holy water?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
