you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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