i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
